26 Comments
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Puma's avatar

Gotta agree with you and F. Scott. There are no good thoughts at 3AM unless you're your younger self) and haven't even thought about going home yet.

Jerry Stahl's avatar

Have to agree.

Those days are gone(-ish). Though insomnia may be the last - worst - drug of all.

Puma's avatar

Add a cocktail with depression and you can't beat it.

Rock and Roll Girl's avatar

There’s a saying “You can sleep when you’re dead”

Jerry Stahl's avatar

But you can die when you’re asleep, right?

Rock and Roll Girl's avatar

Yes that’s my preference!

Jerry Stahl's avatar

We should all be so lucky!

Rock and Roll Girl's avatar

I go into a rant when I wake up every morning!

Jerry Stahl's avatar

Great way to start your day —

Hit the ground screaming!

Rock and Roll Girl's avatar

😂 true story

POOREST GUMP's avatar

Brother Joe keep going bro great stuff!

Philip James Shaw's avatar

Preach, Jerry. Preach!

Jerry Stahl's avatar

Thanks for the note.

In truth, if I were the preacher, I would leave the congregation…

Philip James Shaw's avatar

What if that’s what all this is, a congregation? And there’s no escaping it, no leaving it? Then just find the voices telling truth and hold on for dear life. Oh, dear!

Ylfa Edelstein's avatar

As a long term committed insomniac, I relate on so many levels. Most nights I don't fall asleep till 4 or 5 am. At least at some point I stop thinking and then these fluid, light shapes start dancing in my scull and I see all sorts of interesting things. Like a Dali painting, melting shapes and faces. Nights are strange. But so are days.

Jerry Stahl's avatar

I kind of love the idea of a Dali painting. I think you’re right - in some weird way insomnia makes you creative. Even involuntarily…

Thank you for getting in touch!

Ylfa Edelstein's avatar

Thank you. Thinking of that Dali painting with the melting clock. He probably never slept! I had this book of Insomnia Poetry that I would read sometime but it felt like too on the nose, but then I found this book of Japanese Death Poems. Sometimes I grab Rilke’s

Book of Hours. Or Zen Flesh, Zen Bones.

Kate Ardis Oden's avatar

Yeah, I have discovered why I’m here, or rather you discovered me for reading you. “Let’s get paranoid together, shall we?” This, despite terrifying subject that’s no stranger, feels GOOD to read.

Michael Taylor's avatar

I wait for these columns with the same yearning for sleep I feel upon returning to the warm bed after a 3:00 a.m. piss, when The Mind -- my nocturnal enemy -- performs the worst, most self-sabotaging act possible: it begins to think ... and all is lost.

Another epic post, Jerry, laden with truth, laughs, and heavy sighs. Thanks!

Jerry Stahl's avatar

“It begins to think - and all is lost… “ Exactly!

Thank you. Beautifully put.

Andrea Stein's avatar

I am sorry you are experiencing insomnia hell but if it generates this kind of brilliant (to say nothing of entertaining) writing, then there is something to be said for it.

Paul Riddell's avatar

I’m having the same problem, and I haven’t had this level of can’t-sleep-world-on-fire insomnia since the end of 1988. Worse, I’ll get to sleep at a normal time, wake up about an hour later just burning up, so I get up without waking either my girlfriend or the cat (a tough order when your cat is a 10-kilo fuzzy tumor who spreads across half the bed in order to warm his feet on my ribs), galumph to the kitchen for water, and alternate between eating spoonfuls of crunchy peanut butter straight from the 4-pound jar and “getting caught up on the news.” Next thing I know, the sun is coming up, the cat is yelling at me because his feet are cold, my girlfriend is checking on me because I’ve eaten three pounds of peanut butter, and only THEN do I feel the urge to sleep. It’s leading to some of the best material I’ve written since 2000, but at what cost, Jerry? AT WHAT COST?

Jerry Stahl's avatar

Oh man, I can relate. Especially the tub o’peanut butter…

I fucking love the description of your cat as a “10 kilo fuzzy tumor” - though I don’t know how your cat feels about it….

On the plus side, sounds like your writing is going well. So hey, it’s all worthwhile!

Really appreciate you getting in touch, man.

Paul Riddell's avatar

Glad to be of service, kemo sabe. As for Parker having issues with being compared to a tumor, he's heard much worse. I'm fairly certain that he thinks I don't love him if I don't make disparaging remarks to him eight times a day, because he sure as hell makes disparaging remarks to me.

Jerry Stahl's avatar

Parker sounds like my kind of cat—

Paul Riddell's avatar

You should hear him after I sing to him. His theme is a rewrite of Primus's "Wynona's Big Brown Beaver," starting with "Paul's got a big brown tumor..."